


I Missed You

by whooshboomtree (IttyBittyDungeonTree)



Category: Rockman X | Mega Man X, Rockman Zero | Mega Man Zero
Genre: Also you can pry my Axl content from my cold dead hands, Angst, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, MMZ is bad at giving Zero a personality so I fixed it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-20
Updated: 2020-12-21
Packaged: 2021-03-11 03:55:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,771
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28198764
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IttyBittyDungeonTree/pseuds/whooshboomtree
Summary: The last thing Zero expected was for someone from his past to show up and save him from the Pantheons that day. And with so few of his memories intact, it should have been easy to say goodbye and move on- but to Zero's surprise, he found it anything but.
Comments: 5
Kudos: 28





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So back in 2014 I wrote this angsty little thing where Zero-era Zero runs into Axl and it was like 7 pages long I was like 'yeah, this is heartwrenching as FUCK'.  
> It's now 6 years later, my prose and ability to break my own heart with character angst has vastly improved, and also somehow in rewriting this it became 18 pages long instead of 7.  
> So, uh...oops?  
> Takes place between Z1 and Z2, also technically falls in the same universe as that Lumine/Axl angst I wrote recently. I'm on a kick apparently.

The blade cut through the air in a flash of green, and the Pantheon fell, the top half of its body landing a foot away from the lower half with a metallic clang.

Zero took in a sharp breath as the motion sent a jolt of pain up his arm, but there was no time to dwell on it before three more Pantheons were already closing in. Each one fell just as quickly with a sharp hiss of plasma and a spray of dark coolant, and Zero found himself grateful that they didn’t have enough sentience to notice the way his breaths were growing heavy.

He’d been doing this for at least six months by this point. Or seven? It was getting harder and harder to keep track of time lately. He was also well aware, as he cut down an oncoming ball of plasma and darted in close to remove the offending unit’s right arm, that it had been several days since he’d found a chance to recharge for more than an hour, much less get a proper sleep cycle. Even someone like him had his limits, but he didn’t really have a spare moment to consider things like ‘limits’ or ‘stamina’ when the seemingly-infinite supply of Pantheons wouldn’t afford him any peace.

With a grunt of displeasure, he turned and cut three more units down, another sharp pain in his shoulder nearly causing him to drop his saber. It was only a moment of distraction, a fraction of a second of hesitation, but it was just enough for one of the Pantheons to get in a little too close and jam the electrified end of its arm into his exposed side.

Zero gritted his teeth to stifle a cry of pain as the electricity surged through a half-healed gash just below his ribs, quickly reaching for his gun and blowing the Pantheon’s internal components to bits with one well-placed shot. He sensed two more approaching right behind him though, and as he started to whip around to face them, he felt a sudden rush of weakness in his knees, system damage and exhaustion starting to catch up with him in one rapidly rising wave.

His vision grew blurry for a moment, long enough for another Pantheon to raise its blaster, and the next thing he felt was the familiar explosive heat of a plasma ball tearing into his stomach, followed by the hard-packed dirt floor of the desert under his spine. One of his proximity alerts flared, and he rolled to one side, dodging another shot more by instinct than anything else, his optics coming back into focus just in time to see the Pantheon’s plasma cannon inches away from his head.

He managed to raise his sword in time to block some of the impact, but not all of it, the blast sending him skidding and rolling several feet backwards across the dirt. Don’t stop, he told himself, struggling to push himself up in spite of the blinding pain in the shoulder that he was pretty sure had been dislocated when he hit the ground. Couldn’t stop. Had to keep going, even if his vision was swimming and his limbs were beginning to feel like lead weights. Had to…

Had to…

Damn...he couldn’t get his legs to move…

He made one more frantic attempt to get to his feet, the strain on his systems causing his optics to fuzz over with static. His vision went dark, but he could still hear the hum of a plasma cannon nearby, too nearby, and not just one, but at least five, maybe more, too many, there were too many of these damn things-

“Zero, watch out!”

Gunfire rattled the air around him, followed by a series of clanks of numerous bodies hitting the ground, and then it was quiet.

Quiet.

It had been days since Zero had heard anything even remotely resembling ‘quiet’.

He took in a sharp breath, blinking rapidly to force his optics back online and folding his good arm under his body to push himself up. There wasn’t a single Pantheon left in sight- well there were plenty in sight, but none that appeared to be functional, the ones lying nearest to him riddled with the distinctive marks of plasma bullets.

Still blinking to keep his vision from blurring, he lifted his head, just barely able to make out a figure carefully picking his way through the bodies, pausing and angling what Zero presumed was a gun at each one as if making sure they were well and truly destroyed. Zero opened his mouth to issue a challenge as the figure got closer, but before he could get out so much as a word, his body suddenly seized up, system damage hitting him like an oncoming supply train as his arms went limp and he dropped to the ground unconscious.

* * *

The first thing Zero was aware of when he awoke was the soft feel of a cushion under his neck, followed shortly by the dull ache radiating through his whole body. Not as bad as he’d expected though, all things considered, except for his headache. The headache was pretty bad.

He slowly opened his eyes, relieved to find that there wasn’t enough light in the room to make the pounding in his head any worse. The space was small, though not uncomfortably so, and seemingly indoors, and when he turned his head he could see both his saber and his gun on the floor next to the couch he was laying on.

“You’re already up? Damn, some things never change.”

Zero jerked his head toward the sound and reflexively made a move to sit up, hissing quietly at the resulting pain in his neck and shoulder. “Easy, easy!” the speaker assured, stepping out of the doorway and holding his hands up. “Zero, it’s just me!”

He was a Reploid, though not a particularly tall or imposing one, dressed in slim, navy-blue armor with a handgun holstered on each hip. His auburn hair was pulled up in a spiky ponytail that stuck out the back of his helmet, and his expression was full of friendliness in spite of the x-shaped scar framing his eyes. “The rumors were true then,” he said, his voice softening and a smile pulling at his lips- a smile full of far more joy than anyone Zero had met since coming out of stasis. “You finally woke up.”

Zero frowned, squinting at the other Reploid and feeling as if something was tugging at the deepest recesses of his processor. Something… “You...saved me,” he said slowly.

“Course I saved you,” the other Reploid said. “You…” He paused, and though he was still smiling, there was no mistaking the way his expression seemed to drop, the way his shoulders slumped just slightly. “You...don’t recognize me.”

Zero shook his head, unsure why the sadness beginning to well in the other Reploid’s eyes made him feel as if he’d just taken a fresh kick to the stomach. “Right,” the other Reploid said softly. “X said this might happen. You...you were so badly damaged when we put you in stasis that we weren’t sure if you’d even wake up. Or...what would be left.”

“X?” Zero echoed. That, at least, was familiar. “You know X?”

“Yeah. You...you and X...were my mentors. And my best friends. I’m…” The other Reploid’s voice faltered, and Zero didn’t miss the way his lips twitched slightly as though he was struggling to hold his smile. “I’m Axl.”

Axl?

Axl…

There was something...something about that name was…

Zero winced, biting back a hiss of pain and leaning forward to rub his temples with one hand. “Sorry,” he said. “A lot of things are still...fuzzy.”

“It...it’s okay,” Axl assured, even though the look in his eyes seemed to suggest that it was anything but. “You want something hot to drink? I still have some coffee left.”

“Sure.”

“Be right back. Stay here and don’t hurt yourself any worse, mmkay?”

Zero simply raised an eyebrow and watched Axl hurry out of the room, wondering if the coffee was just an excuse to take a minute alone to collect himself. His headache was getting worse, and he sat back with a resigned sigh and started looking over his system scans to assess the damage. His mentor, was it? And...his friend…

Axl returned a few minutes later, and while there was no hiding the hurt in his gaze, his smile seemed steadier as he handed Zero one of the two steaming mugs he was carrying. “Sorry, I don’t have any cream,” he said. “It doesn’t exactly keep well considering uh...you know.”

“It’s fine.” Zero took a sip, feeling himself relax slightly at the bitter taste. That was...familiar, in a way he couldn’t put words to. “Where are we?”

“Abandoned house,” Axl replied with a shrug. “It’s really not much. Just some shelter from the elements and a place to sleep. I’ve got a few cloaking devices up to keep the Pantheons out, but who knows how long they’ll last. How’s your shoulder?”

“Sore, but I’ve felt worse.”

“Better sore than numb. You smashed it right out of its socket.”

“I figured. I take it that means you fixed me?”

“Sure did,” Axl replied, his eyes lighting up with pride. “How’d I do? I’m no medic or anything, but I’ve had some practice lately, fixing myself up and all.”

“Not too bad,” Zero said with a nod. Most of his scans had finished at this point, and while he wasn’t at one hundred percent, he was certainly better off than he’d been before Axl found him. “Are you going to drink that?” he asked, indicating Axl’s untouched coffee mug.

“Oh, yeah, right.” Axl lifted the mug to his lips and took a long drink, his expression twisting in such a grimace that Zero almost found himself beginning to smile. “What?”

“You don’t actually like coffee, do you?”

“Oh, hell no,” Axl said with a laugh. “It tastes terrible. I’ve just been drinking it because it’s warm and because I ran out of tea.”

That laugh- Zero  _ knew _ that laugh. It was bright and friendly and held so much joy, so much  _ life _ , and again Zero felt his headache briefly intensify as if his systems were straining to process something and kept coming up with blanks. But he was so sure there was something- some flash of a destroyed highway, the sound of gunfire, and that laugh- that  _ laugh _ …

“I didn’t see you around the resistance base,” Zero said, hoping that conversation would distract him from his processor’s attempt to flood him with memories he wasn’t even sure existed any more. “You work alone?”

“Yeah. I sort of...I’m kind of more comfortable working from the shadows these days.” Axl looked down at his mug, idly rubbing his thumb back and forth across the chipped ceramic. “It’s funny. Back in the day, all I ever wanted to do was be a hero like you guys. Now it somehow feels more right to just roam around and help whoever I come across, even if they don’t know I’m there.”

“Well you know,” Zero said, watching as Axl finished off his coffee with one more long gulp and one more comical grimace. “You don’t have to be flashy to be heroic. And after all, you saved me. I’m more than grateful for that.”

“Thanks, Zee,” Axl whispered, his smile soft and unmistakably pained, but genuine nonetheless. “That means a lot. Coming from you.”

"Of course," Zero said, beginning to grow somewhat unsettled by the weight in his chest. "I appreciate you fixing me up, but I should get going. There are still too many of those things out there."

"Ohh, no you don't," Axl said, getting to his feet as Zero set his empty mug aside. "One nap and a handful of repairs do not a functional fighter make. You're staying right there until you've recovered."

"I've recovered just fine," Zero said, his lip twitching with annoyance as he stood. "I don't have time to-"

He caught the flash of movement too late to stop it, and next thing he knew, he was flat on his back with Axl grinning down at him. "You wanna rethink that?" he asked, and Zero couldn't help but notice the way some of the sadness in his eyes had lifted for the moment.

"Lucky swing," Zero muttered, and Axl laughed again.

"Zero, if one of me can take you off your feet before you can even blink, whaddya think twenty or thirty drones are gonna do? Take a couple days to rest for once in your life. Besides," Axl added, his eyes gleaming with mischief. "I bet you couldn't get past me right now if you wanted to."

"Don't push it, kid," Zero said, the words slipping out before he even realized what he was saying. "Fine though. But only until I’m back on my feet.”

“I know,” Axl said, and again there was that unmistakable flash of sadness behind his smile. “Hang tight for a few. Your saber looks like it could use some repairs; I’ll go get you a toolkit.”

Axl headed out shortly after handing off the toolkit, claiming he needed to do a sweep of the perimeter and ensure that the cloaking devices were still functional. “And so help me,” he’d added, looking back and offering Zero a grin, “if I find you running laps I’ll tie you to the couch upside down and keep you that way ‘til your systems are fully functional again.”

Zero was fairly confident that even in this state, he wouldn’t let Axl make good on that threat- but he’d nodded in agreement all the same.

Considering their apparent shared history, Zero wouldn’t have blamed the kid if his ‘perimeter sweep’ was just an excuse to be alone with his thoughts for a while. Not that he didn’t need that himself for a bit. His chest  _ ached _ . It ached like a piece of him had been torn away but no part of his processor could explain exactly what was  _ missing _ . But looking at Axl and seeing the pain in his smile…

Not for the first time, he found himself wishing that recovering lost memory data was as simple as rebooting a computer.

In spite of the ache in his chest, it was nice to hear someone else’s voice all the same. Axl seemed to feel the same way for how talkative he was, though Zero also couldn’t help but imagine that he’d probably always been that way.

“He’s just so  _ stupid _ , you know?” Axl was saying as Zero thought as much a couple of days later. “Like, you’d think after all these years he’d have turned into  _ slightly  _ less of a jackass, but noooo, he’s still gotta be so smug about  _ literally everything _ .”

“He doesn’t sound like someone you’d usually hang around with,” Zero pointed out, picking up a small pair of wire clippers and continuing to fine-tune the connection to the power cell of his saber.

“He’s not,” Axl said with a shrug. “He’s stupid. I just get really tired of not hearing anything besides the sound of my own voice sometimes and space-for-brains is the only person I seem to be able to regularly run into.”

“So when you said working in the shadows, you really meant it.”

“Yeah. Advantage of being one of the few Reploids left alive with a copy chip these days, even if it’s a shoddy one.”

“Copy chip?”

“Oh...right.” Axl’s shoulders sagged slightly, and Zero frowned, feeling a pang of guilt at seeing the other Reploid’s smile drop. “Sorry, I keep forgetting that you don’t…”

“It’s fine,” Zero assured. “You were saying?”

“About working in the shadows?” Axl asked, and Zero nodded. “I can sort of copy other Reploids’ forms, though it’s not very refined. After you sealed yourself, I started really working on my sniping skills. The two kind of go hand in hand, you know?”

“Makes sense,” Zero said, grimacing slightly as he felt a fresh pain in his temples.

_ “Oh yeah! I forgot to tell you. This is the reason I ran away from Red Alert! ‘Cause I can copy the shape and abilities of other Reploids.” _

_ “Where did you learn something like that?” _

_ “Heh, that’s the thing...I don’t even remember.” _

Zero blinked, unsure if the garbled voices were fragments of some long-corrupted memory, or just his processor trying to fabricate something to fill the holes. “I actually worked with your unit sometimes,” Axl added. “Mostly I was on the front lines with X, but you borrowed me for stealth missions now and again. It always felt like such an honor.”

“Did it now?” Zero asked. “How’s that?”

“Well...y’know...just because you’re you, for one,” Axl said, and Zero was admittedly relieved to see him relaxing slightly. “No offense, but you’re kinda scary. Especially when we first met, you always looked like you were mad at me for something,” he added with a laugh. “You still kinda look like you’re mad at me for something even right now.”

“I think that’s just my face, Axl…”

_ “Why do you look so nervous?” _

_ “I dunno, because you’re always looking at me like you wanna rip my head off my shoulders, especially right now?” _

_ “I’m pretty sure that’s just his face, Axl. Especially when he’s tired.” _

_ “Thanks for the moral support, X.” _

_ “Anytime, Zero.” _

“It wasn’t just you being intimidating though,” Axl added. “You never said anything if you didn’t mean it. So like...when you said you wanted me to join your squad for an important mission, I knew you meant it.”

Zero hummed in quiet agreement, clipping a final wire into place before snapping the casing back onto the hilt of the saber and sitting up with a noise of satisfaction. “That should do. Thanks for the spare parts, by the way. This thing’s had an unstable power cell for a couple months now.”

“That’s because you’ve been out stabbing Pantheons for months straight instead of taking a chance to fix anything up,” Axl teased. “Including yourself. Speaking of which, how’s your shoulder doing?”

“It’s still a bit stiff,” Zero said. “But much better than it was. And to that end, the world’s not exactly in a state for me to take a long vacation right now.”

“Yeah, but even you have your limits. Jeez, some things never change,” Axl chuckled, getting to his feet. “If you’re that restless, you can come check the perimeter with me. One of the cloaking devices was acting a little weird the other day so I’ve been keeping an eye on it.”

“Thanks,” Zero said, “but I think I’ll stay here and work on some target practice.” He paused, raising an eyebrow. “With your permission, doctor.”

Axl laughed, and Zero found himself hard-pressed to fight the smile threatening to tug at the corners of his mouth. “Fine,” Axl said. “But don’t overdo it or I’ll make you stay here another week.”

“Deal.”

In a way, Zero was relieved to have a few hours to himself- not because he was particularly bothered by Axl’s company, but just to give his processor a chance to stop spinning itself in circles trying to remember things that may or may not have even happened. There was no denying that Axl’s smile was familiar though. Familiar in a way that was...comfortable, even if Zero couldn’t explain why. More comfortable than anyone he’d met at the Resistance base, even Ceil and Cerveau.

There was also no denying that every time Axl’s smile dropped, every time the sadness in his gaze became more obvious, Zero felt as if someone had just shot a plasma cannon at his chest. And what a strange thing- to feel so much...there was no point in skirting around it, so much  _ warmth _ for someone he had effectively met only a couple of days ago. Hard to ignore, all the same.

Incredibly, almost painfully hard to ignore.

Was there worry there too? If there was, he told himself, there shouldn’t be. Axl was clearly more than capable of taking care of himself, even more so if he’d been working on his own for so long and had come out relatively unscathed. Still…

Still…

He scowled slightly, knocking down the last of the empty coffee cans he’d set up with one more well-placed shot and lowering his gun with a quiet sigh. “Looks like your aim’s still pretty good,” came Axl’s voice from behind him, and he started slightly, cursing under his breath and making a note to give his proximity sensors another once-over.

Axl strode past him with a hum, setting one of the coffee cans back on the edge of the stone wall that ringed the makeshift backyard. “Still not as good as mine though. May I?” he asked, holding out a hand.

Zero handed him the gun with a nod, stepping back to watch as Axl took aim at the coffee can and sent it flying with one well-placed shot. “Mmm...sight’s off by two degrees,” Axl said. “I’ll give it a look. C’mon.”

Still humming to himself quietly, Axl turned on his heel and loped back inside, leaving Zero to follow behind. He watched as Axl sat down on the couch and popped open a repair kit, immediately getting to work adjusting the sight. “How are  _ you _ holding up, Axl?” Zero asked, taking a seat nearby.

“Me?” Axl asked, glancing up briefly from his work and offering Zero a grin. “Don’t worry about me. I hold up just fine.”

“Mmm.”

“What’s that noise supposed to mean?”

“Come on, kid,” Zero said, the words once again leaving his mouth before he even had a chance to think. “You know you can’t get that bullshit past me.”

Axl blinked, looking visibly startled for a moment before he managed a smile, though there was no hiding the way his lips were quivering slightly. “D-damn,” he murmured. “It’s been...a really long time since you’ve said that to me…”

He shook his head, clearing his throat and quickly seeming to straighten himself out. “Okay, so maybe ‘fine’ isn’t exactly the right word. But seriously, I’m getting by. As long as there are still people out there who need my help, I’ll keep doing everything I can to help them.”

Axl set his tools aside and lifted the gun to his cheek, closing one eye to check the sight before handing it back to Zero with a nod. “That should do. I’d up the fire rate, but it’s not a particularly high-end model, and I’m afraid I might fry the cells by accident.”

“That’s all right. I appreciate it regardless.”

“Don’t mention it. You’ll need it in top shape when you head back out there.”

“Right,” Zero murmured, feeling a strange pang of cold in his chest at the thought of going ‘back out there’. Or maybe it wasn’t so much the thought of going back out there as it was the thought of…

Damn…

“Anyhow, it’s getting late,” Axl said, abruptly breaking Zero’s train of thought. “I think I’mma have some coffee and then turn in for the night. You wanna join me?”

“Yeah,” Zero said, deciding not to comment on the irony of Axl using coffee as his pre-bedtime drink of choice. “That sounds nice.”

It wasn’t too long before Axl was handing Zero a mug of hot coffee and beckoning for him to come outside, and Zero followed with a silent nod of thanks. “It’s not even that I like coffee,” Axl said quietly once they had both taken a seat on the top of the stone wall, the scarred landscape before them bathed in a soft orange evening glow. “I think it’s just nice to feel warm. You know what I mean?”

Zero simply nodded once again, and Axl sighed, looking down at his lap and clutching his mug just a little tighter. “It’s been a long time since I’ve shared it with anyone,” he added. “I know it’s probably kind of weird, listening to me rambling all the time. But I appreciate it.”

There was that smile again- that gentle, warm, yet ever-pained smile. “Seriously though,” Axl said before Zero could think of any words that might help. “Don’t worry too much about me. Considering the circumstances, I think I could be doing a lot worse.”

“Mm. All right. I suppose you’re not wrong about that.”

They both fell silent for some time, the peaceful quiet only broken when Axl piped up with a soft, “I know you can’t stay. And I know I can’t come with you.”

Zero made a notable effort not to wince, Axl having voiced aloud the exact worry that had been running through his mind. He knew he needed to be realistic- he knew that. If Axl really could do his best work from the shadows, the last thing he needed was to be around someone as high-profile as Zero; even if he did keep himself in disguise,  _ someone _ was eventually bound to pick up on a pattern and blow his cover. But at the same time, the thought of saying ‘I have to go’ and seeing the brokenhearted look on the kid’s face was…

“Don’t feel bad,” Axl said, almost as if he’d read Zero’s mind. “I know things aren’t the way they used to be. And I know how much the world needs you.”

“Don’t sell yourself short, kid,” Zero said, and there it was again, words coming out before he could even think, as if it was something he’d said before even if he had no proper memory of doing so. “From the sound of things, you’ve been doing plenty of good out there yourself. The world needs people like you.”

“Like me?”

“Brave. Compassionate. Still optimistic even in a world that’s gone to shit. Still caring even when humans as a whole would probably just as well prefer you didn’t exist. I think…” Zero paused, searching for the right words for a moment. “I think a lot of people don’t realize how much they need to see a smile like yours now and then.”

“Jeez...high praise, coming from you of all people,” Axl said with a shaky laugh.

“You said yourself I don’t say things if I don’t mean them,” Zero pointed out.

“That’s true.” Axl finished off the last bit of his rapidly-cooling coffee, and Zero still couldn’t help but be amused at the face he made. “I think I’m gonna turn in. You get some rest soon too, yeah?”

“Yeah, I’ll be in soon,” Zero said. “Thanks for the coffee.”

“Heh. Anytime. Night, Zee.”

“Goodnight.”

Zero stayed outside for some time longer, watching the moon slowly begin to climb in the darkening night sky. He wasn’t sure that he’d be able to sleep tonight if he tried. There was far too much going through his mind, far too many emotions tugging his chest in far too many directions.

Guilt was probably the newest one. He hadn’t felt that much since waking up from stasis, if at all up until this point.

Whatever fragments of memories were there felt...jumbled. Though he couldn’t put a finger on much of it, he remembered... _ things _ . Nonspecific things, but... _ things _ , and  _ feelings _ . It was like someone was giving him the highlight reel of someone else’s life story- telling him about this irritating, loudmouthed, cocksure kid with big aspirations and way too much energy to go along with it, but as soon as he felt the annoyance coming on it was quickly replaced by  _ pride _ . Because that was wrong, he wasn’t just an irritating, loudmouthed, cocksure kid with aspirations, he was an irritating, loudmouthed, cocksure kid with  _ passion _ . And willing to push himself  _ hard _ ,  _ wanting _ Zero to push him hard, and that pride swelled at watching him grow-

Zero blinked, hardly realizing that he’d leaned forward to rest his head in his hands. “Asimov in hell,” he muttered aloud, needing several moments to steady himself against the torrent of data trying and only half-succeeding to overwhelm his processor. This damned kid...

He got to his feet with a grunt, stretching for a few moments and working some of the lingering stiffness out of his shoulder before heading inside. Sleep still wasn’t likely, but maybe laying down for a bit would make him feel better.

A quiet noise caused him to stiffen, an almost imperceptible scrape of metal on concrete, but he relaxed after a moment when he picked up no signals other than his own and Axl’s. Some odd gut feeling drew him to turn in the direction the sound had come from, but after one step he stopped and frowned, telling himself that it was probably just Axl rolling over in bed.

And yet…

He muttered a curse under his breath, quietly starting to make his way across the hall. He’d never been in Axl’s room before- it was simply polite, he assumed, to give the kid his privacy. Or, well, some extent of privacy anyway, because it wasn’t as if the bedroom had a door.

Or a bed, for that matter, just a ragged-looking mattress tossed on the floor next to a shattered bedframe. Axl wasn’t even asleep on said mattress- he  _ was _ asleep, but sitting on the floor directly next to the mattress, his head and shoulders leaned back against the wall and his eyes tightly shut. And truthfully, Zero would’ve left him alone if not for the visible crease of tension in his features, not to mention the way his hands were twitching slightly. 

He’d had his share of...unpleasant dreams since waking up from stasis. Most of them left him with jumbled images he couldn’t make sense of,  _ emotions _ that didn’t seem to have a source or reason, feelings of things he was sure he once knew but couldn’t seem to grasp anymore. And while he couldn’t even begin to guess what Axl was dreaming about, it  _ was _ very clear that the kid was distressed.

Taking care not to make too much noise lest he startle Axl awake, Zero crept across the room and crouched down in front of him, frowning when the other Reploid twitched again in his sleep and made a quiet noise not unlike a half-repressed sob. “Hey,” Zero said softly. “Wake up, kid…”

Axl didn’t respond, and Zero sighed, raising his voice slightly and reaching out to give the other Reploid’s shoulder a gentle shake. “ _ Axl _ .”

The touch was enough to cause Axl to wake with a slight start, blinking a few times to bring his optics into focus before quickly reaching up to rub the back of his wrist over his eyes. “You okay, kid?” Zero asked quietly.

“Y-yeah. Yeah, I’m fine,” Axl mumbled, drying his eyes a bit more and really not looking very fine at all. “I just...have dreams sometimes. I’m okay.”

Zero nodded, and though his first instinct was to simply leave the other Reploid to himself and go back to sleep, there was no denying the painful tug in his chest that told him to stay. “Are you sure?” he asked, sitting down at Axl’s side and leaning back against the wall.

Axl didn’t answer right away, hugging his knees to his chest and fixing his gaze on the floor. He opened his mouth as if to speak, paused, and then closed it again, hunching his shoulders slightly as if trying to curl up and disappear. “Is it weird?” he finally asked, his voice barely above a whisper. “Being told you should know me even though you don’t?”

“A bit,” Zero replied. “Being around you doesn’t bother me though, if that’s what you’re asking.”

“Mm. It’s just…” Axl sighed, closing his eyes and hugging his knees a bit tighter. “It’s not fair, you know?”

Zero frowned, unable to voice how much he shared the sentiment. “I dunno what the universe thinks I did to deserve this,” Axl went on quietly. “Losing you when you sealed yourself, and then losing you again, and then losing X, and...and  _ everyone _ in that war. And...and then when I finally see you again, you don’t even remember...anything. I just…” He drew a shaky sigh, and it was clear from the tension in his body how close he was to breaking down. “I just miss you so much…”

Boy...Zero really wasn’t good at this kind of thing. He wasn’t sure if he ever had been, but he certainly wasn’t now. And yet, the pull in his chest was still undeniable, telling him that he had to do  _ something _ . He didn’t know what, just... _ something _ . “I miss you too,” he finally said.

Axl looked up in surprise at that, blinking and tilting his head slightly. “It’s...confusing,” Zero went on. “Even though I don’t remember much, when I hear you laugh, or see the way you smile, it’s like there’s something... _ there _ . Something I can’t put my finger on. I felt the same way when I was fighting that copy of X.” He frowned, lifting a hand to rub the side of his head. “It’s frustrating.”

“Do you  _ want _ to remember?”

“Of course.”

“Even if some of it was bad?”

“More than anything,” Zero sighed. “I’d take a lifetime of hurt over feeling...like this.” Feeling so  _ hollow _ . Feeling like so much was  _ missing _ . Feeling so...oddly incomplete.

“A lifetime of hurt, huh,” Axl echoed softly. “Seems like that’s about what things have felt like lately.” He shook his head, a wry smile crossing his features. “Dammit, what the hell am I doing...I’m supposed to be out there protecting people and I’m just...sulking…”

“Axl…” Zero, too, shook his head, reaching over to lay a hand on the other Reploid’s shoulder. “It’s okay to take time to rest, you know. No one can blame you for that after everything that’s happened.”

“I know,” Axl whispered. “I know that, so why...why...does it still hurt so much…”

Zero sighed, scooting closer without really thinking and allowing Axl to lean against his shoulder. The contact felt...strange. He’d hardly had physical contact with anything not trying to kill him since he’d woken up from stasis, much less affection. And yet...it felt nice, all the same. Comforting, oddly enough.

“I’m sorry,” Axl said softly. “I...I know this must be awkward for you. But I just…”

_ “Sorry. This is probably kind of awkward for you, huh? It’s just that sometimes when I’m really on-edge it helps if I’m not by myself and stuff…” _

“Axl…”

“Sorry,” Axl repeated, his voice tight as if he was fighting to keep his composure. “I just want to feel like...like I’m not by myself. Just for one night.”

_ “I don’t mind, kid. I wouldn’t have said you can stay here if I did.” _

The memory was still fuzzy, but for some reason, this time he had no doubt it was a real memory and not just his processor fabricating something to stop itself from throwing errors. He doubted he’d ever been a particularly warm person, even back then, but there was such familiarity in having Axl of all people looking to him for comfort and support, and he could feel Axl shaking, the kid was  _ shaking _ …

“It’s all right,” Zero said quietly, laying his arm across Axl’s shoulders. “I’m here, kiddo. I’m here.”

They both settled into silence, and over the next few minutes, Zero felt Axl slowly begin to relax. He didn’t move, all the same, and Zero didn’t ask him to. Didn’t  _ want _ him to, in a way. “Thanks, Zee,” Axl eventually whispered. “I’ll...I’ll be okay. I’ll…”

“I know,” Zero murmured. “I know. Just rest for now.”

Axl nodded, and after some time, his breathing began to slow as he drifted back off to sleep. Zero stayed awake, content to let his systems run through their standard recharge cycle even though sitting on the floor wasn’t the most comfortable way he’d ever spent a night. Besides, it was just one night.

Just...one night…

Eventually, in spite of the countless questions and uncertainties running through his head, he found his eyes growing heavy, and the next time he jerked back to consciousness, Axl was gone.

He blinked, rubbing his eyes groggily for a moment before getting to his feet and stretching to work the stiffness from his lower back. The house was quiet, and Axl’s signal wasn’t in range of his scanners.

At least it wasn’t for a few seconds before it abruptly blipped into existence in the other room, accompanied by the telltale hum of teleportation and several curses in Russian. “Axl?” Zero called, hurrying out of the bedroom and already reaching for the hilt of his saber.

To his relief, Axl looked no worse for the wear, not to mention more frustrated than shaken. “Knew that signal cloaker was dying,” Axl hissed, beckoning Zero closer and pressing his back against the wall. “Pantheons. We’ve got about two minutes until they swarm this place, they got a lock on my signal right before I teleported and I wasn’t very far out.”

“Right,” Zero said. “About time to put those repairs of yours to the test. How many did you see coming?”

“Dunno. Lots, probably.” Axl cracked a grin, every trace of his exhausted despair from the previous night replaced by a fresh gleam of energy. “Might be a little unfair, the two of us against all of them.”

“Might be,” Zero said with a hum of agreement. “Should I tie one hand behind my back to give them half a chance?”

Axl’s grin broadened, and Zero was hard-pressed to fight a threatening smile of his own. “Naaaaah. Think you can get the drop on them if I give you cover fire?”

“Go for it. I’ll be right behind.”

“Gimme a sixty-second head start.” Axl crouched down slightly, his form seeming to shift and waver for a few moments before disappearing entirely, and Zero only picked up on the sound of his rapidly-retreating footsteps because he was listening for it. “Atta way, kid,” he muttered, waiting for a minute per Axl’s instructions before quietly starting to make his way outside.

Well, Axl hadn’t been wrong- the Pantheons were approaching fast, already in range for Zero’s broader signal sweeps to pick them up. ‘Lots’ was certainly apt too, certainly too many to count at a glance. Zero took up a position out of their sight just to the left of the doorframe, keeping his saber deactivated for the moment so as not to give them an energy source to pick up on. Not yet, he told himself, letting his scanners map out the placement of the enemies shifting about outside and already beginning to plan his movements. Easy...just a little longer…

A rattle of gunfire split the air, and Zero leapt out from the doorway, the blade of his saber activating with a hum and four Pantheons collapsing to the ground before they even had the chance to register Zero’s presence.

A number of red optics turned in Zero’s direction, but he didn’t even pause for breath before throwing himself into the fray, the morning peace and quiet shattered by the buzz of his blade and the tearing of metal and coolant lines, punctured every few seconds by the sharp snap-hiss of a plasma bullet. Every time Zero turned at the sense of something getting too close, the Pantheon in question was already falling, dark fluid spilling from the telltale puncture wound in its head casing.

Rather quickly, Zero began to fall into a comfortable rhythm, trusting Axl to cover his blind spots and openings to allow him to focus on the threat directly in front of him. It was strange, how easy it was- how  _ natural _ it felt, especially considering that Zero had deliberately chosen to tackle nearly all of his work with the Resistance alone, reluctant to have anyone less capable there to slow him down. This, however- if only he could have  _ this _ kind of backup more often.

“Heads up, kid!” he called, noticing a few stray Pantheons starting to clamber their way up the gutter out of the corner of his eye. “Four coming your way!”

“I got it! Comin’ down!” A moment later, Axl made a flying leap off the front of the roof, a heavy-looking gun resting on his shoulder. He landed in a neat skid, immediately turning and dropping to one knee and firing two grenades from the weapon’s barrel, annihilating all four Pantheons and a good bit of the side of the house in the process. “How’d you know I was on the roof?” he asked, quickly getting to his feet as the grenade launcher shrank down into a handgun. “I was being all stealthy and everything.”

“Call it a hunch,” Zero grunted, not really sure of the answer himself and choosing not to question how Axl’s weapon had gone from pistol to grenade launcher and back again on a whim. “Less talking, more fighting.”

“Always so serious,” Axl laughed, already leaping into the thick of the fight regardless. “Some things never change!”

If Zero thought having Axl covering him from a distance was comfortable, having the other Reploid at ground-level with him was another thing entirely. Axl seemed to know exactly where and how Zero was going to move, quick to fall into step with him without getting too close or being in the way. Zero soon picked up on Axl’s rhythm as well, moving to cover his openings and blind spots just as Axl continually shifted position to guard Zero’s, never once slowing down or getting rattled.

And as fast as it had started, it was over.

Zero spun instinctively as the Pantheon before him- or at least what pieces remained of it- dropped to the ground with a clatter, surprised to find that there was suddenly nothing left to swing at. “Holy shit,” Axl said, visibly winded, only lightly scathed, but still grinning from ear-to-ear. “Was that awesome? ‘Cause I feel like we were kinda freaking awesome just now.”

“I haven’t met anyone with anywhere close to that level of speed and precision since waking up,” Zero said, slightly out of breath himself but otherwise relatively unharmed. “You’re something else, kid.”

“Heh, really?” Axl said, and Zero couldn’t help but be amused at the way he suddenly looked unsure if he should be proud or flustered. “Well I mean, I did have some pretty badass mentors. Looks like you and X taught me well, huh?”

“Whatever we taught you, you certainly took it to heart.”

“Course I did! I listened to you guys way more than you probably think I did.” Axl let his shoulders drop slightly, letting out a quiet huff and holstering his pistol. “That aside, this isn’t exactly a safe place to rest anymore. Even if I had the parts to patch that signal cloak, it won’t be long before more of those things start showing up.”

“Guess it’s time I got back out there and got to work then,” Zero said, sheathing his saber and straightening up.

“Guess so,” Axl agreed, and there was no missing the hint of sadness in his tone. “Suppose it’s for the best. I hate hanging around the same place for too long.”

“You sure you don’t want to join the resistance?” Zero asked. “They’d be more than happy to have someone like you in their ranks.”

“I’m sure,” Axl said with a shake of his head. “Bad guys can’t catch me if they never find out who I am, right?”

“All right,” Zero said. “But be careful out there.”

“Speak for yourself,” Axl chuckled. “But seriously, I’ll be fine. I’ll make you and X proud. Count on it.”

“You’re already doing that, kid,” Zero said. “I don’t need memories to be sure of that much.”

Axl looked as if he wasn’t sure if he’d rather smile or cry, so he seemed to settle for something in between, hurriedly lifting a hand to wipe his eyes. “Right then,” Zero said, some part of him wanting to find a reason to stall and the rest of him knowing that he needed to get moving before he changed his mind. “I’d best be off.”

Before he could take more than a step, he was stopped in his tracks by Axl abruptly wrapping him in a hug so tight Zero felt the breath momentarily driven from his chest. He frowned, gently laying his arms around Axl in return and giving him a squeeze, relishing in the odd sense of familiarity for just a few seconds longer.

He didn’t want to admit to himself or anyone else how much letting go was one of the hardest things he’d done since coming out of stasis.

“Alright,” Axl whispered, finally stepping back and drying his eyes one more time, his smile full of love and pain and pride and joy all at once. “I should go too.”

“I’ll miss you, Axl,” Zero said. “And seriously, be safe out there.”

“I’ll miss you too. And don’t worry,” Axl added, his lips quivering slightly as if he was struggling to hold his smile. “I’ll always have your back, whether you know I’m there or not. That’s a promise.”

As if worried that he’d change his mind if he stayed any longer, Axl abruptly turned and darted off, his form wavering for a moment and then disappearing entirely as he activated his cloaking. Zero watched him go in silence, spending a few minutes longer gazing off in the direction he’d left before turning and starting off on his way. It would nag at the back of his mind for a while, he was sure- the hurt behind Axl’s gaze, the fresh weight of nostalgia pulling at his core-

And yet, all the same, he couldn’t help but feel as if, perhaps, the tiniest bit of the gaping hole that always seemed to claw at his chest had been filled in, and maybe, just maybe, it would hurt just a little bit less from now on.


	2. Chapter 2

Falling.

He was falling.

Everything around him was crumbling. Crumbling and disintegrating and growing hot- hotter- so hot that his systems were throwing frantic alerts of impending damage if he stayed here any longer.

As if there was anywhere left for him to go, he thought with a wry smile.

He hadn't come up here expecting to make it out alive, if he was being honest. And that was fine. As long as it meant stopping Dr. Weil for good, he’d be fine.

Well. Relatively speaking, at least.

So that was that. And there was nothing left to do except wait. Wait, and fall, and fall some more, and wait until the sheer heat and gravitational force of reentry finally became too much for his systems to handle.

_ “Zero? Can you hear me?” _

He opened his eyes, startled to hear a voice coming through his communicator- distorted, garbled with static, but...familiar. Familiar in that way that made his chest ache for reasons he still couldn’t properly rationalize.  _ “Well...if you can, I guess...I just wanted to say one last goodbye. _

_ “I still can’t believe you actually went up there. I mean, I can, because you’re you, but still...I’m sure you knew you wouldn’t come back in one piece. Or at all. Everyone was cheering for you down here though. I mean everyone. Humans, Reploids...they all believed in you. You...brought people together. _

_ “I know...you said you don’t think of yourself as a hero. But I do. I always have, even before we ever met in person. You and X were the ones who inspired me to try to be more than just a vigilante kid, you know? I always hoped I could be as brave and confident as you always are. _

_ “Anyway, I should probably quit yammering, I’m sure there’s not much time left. Just...you’ve done a lot, and you deserve a break. So go find X in the afterlife and get some rest, okay? I’ll handle things out here. _

_ “Hope to see you on the other side someday. I’ll...” _

The transmission slowly faded to static, and as Zero’s vision began to do the same, he was surprised to find himself largely unbothered by the pain of his body being slowly torn to pieces along with what remained of Ragnarok. Yeah. Yeah, he was pretty sure things would be okay now. Especially with someone like him around to watch out for people.

* * *

On any other day, it would’ve been so beautiful.

Axl drew one knee up to his chest with a quiet sigh, his gaze fixed on the tiny specks of light streaking across the darkening sky and fading as quickly as they appeared. Such a stunning display- or it would be, if he each falling star didn’t make his heart break a little further.

He didn’t even stir when his scanners picked up an approaching signal, nor when he heard footsteps approaching from behind him. “Is what everyone’s saying true then?” a familiar voice asked after a few moments of silence. “He stopped it?”

“Yeah,” Axl replied quietly. “He did.”

There was another long silence, followed by a soft shuffle as the other unit sat down on the ground a few feet to Axl’s left. Axl didn’t so much as flinch, having grown (reluctantly) accustomed to Lumine’s existence as one of the few people he talked to with some regularity at this point, though even then, ‘regularity’ was probably stretching it. “Do you think he’ll make it?” Lumine asked.

“No,” Axl said with a shaky, humorless laugh. “No, I don’t think even Zero can find a way to survive this one.”

“Mm...I suppose you’re right,” Lumine murmured, turning his gaze up to the sky thoughtfully. “If Ragnarok’s disintegration doesn’t do the job, he’d likely burn up in reentry.”

“Thanks for the positivity.”

“Sorry. I didn’t mean it like that.”

“I know. It’s fine.”

“This is probably a stupid question, but are  _ you _ all right?”

“Not really,” Axl sighed. “I mean...it’s not like there’s much I could’ve done. I had an inkling that something was up with Weil, but I can only do so much on my own. No way in hell I could’ve talked him out of this. And he sure as shit wouldn’t have let me go into something this dangerous with him. Whether he remembered me or not.”

“Somehow, I have to think that he  _ certainly _ wouldn’t have let you go into something this dangerous with him if he remembered who you are.”

“You’re probably right,” Axl said, a brief smile gracing his lips before fading away as quickly as it had come. “It’s just...I wish I’d had the chance to say a proper goodbye, you know?”

He didn’t bother to try to hide the tears rolling down his cheeks, and after a long moment he heard Lumine sigh, followed by a quiet, “I’m sorry, Axl.”

Axl simply nodded, still finding himself unable to tear his gaze away from the sky even as his optics grew blurry. “It’s going to be falling for a while,” Lumine piped up after some time. “You don’t have to stay and watch.”

“I know. It’s not like I have anywhere else to be though. And neither do you, if you came to find me.”

“You know how things are.”

“Yeah, I know. I’ll head off and find a safe place to rest eventually.”

“Mmm. There’s a shitty bed in the library where I’ve been staying for a while.”

“Eh.” Axl shrugged, wiping his eyes even though he was sure they were bound to well up again sooner rather than later. “I think I’m gonna pass on sleep for tonight.”

“There’s also a hole in the ceiling if you fancy stargazing. And I found a bottle of whiskey that’s even more shitty than the bed.”

For some reason, Axl found himself laughing at that, straightening up slightly and wiping his eyes again. “Well how can I possibly say no to that. Lead the way, I guess.”

Lumine stood up, and Axl did the same, pausing to look back one more time at the specks of light still flitting their way across the night sky. “Guess this is goodbye for real, huh,” he whispered. “I meant it though. I’ll take care of things out here, just as soon as I get a little rest. So try not to worry too much.

“So long, Zero. I’ll miss you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yes this is more self-indulgent Lumine/Axl nonsense, did you expect anything less from me

**Author's Note:**

> That was long for a oneshot I feel like but the scenes flowed together so well that I couldn't find a good spot to break between chapters so I just rolled with it.  
> I realize I took a lot of liberties here, but MMZ does such a poor job of handling Zero's amnesia to the point where he feels like he has almost no personality whatsoever, so clearly it's my job to fix what Capcom fucked up. Besides, isn't it even MORE heartwrenching this way?  
> Tiny follow-up chapter coming soon!


End file.
